66 ordspråk av Conan O'Brien
Conan O'Brien
A public relations firm said that rock star David Lee Roth owes them over $110,000. The strange thing is that it's the first time that David Lee Roth has had any publicity in ten years.
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A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh."
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Apparently Arnold was inspired by President Bush, who proved you can be a successful politician in this country even if English is your second language.
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Apparently the new high-tech Star Wars toys will be in stores any day now. The toys can talk and are interactive, so they can be easily distinguished from Star Wars fans.
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Baseball said it's instituting tougher steriod testing. For the 1st offense, players get a 10-game suspension. For repeat offenses, players will get a batting championship.
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Bob Dole is going to be appearing in a Pepsi commercial with Britney Spears. Yeah, apparently Dole says that if this doesn't cure his erectile dysfunction, nothing will.
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CBS news anchor Dan Rather has interviewed Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein. When asked what it was like to talk to a crazy man, Saddam said, 'It's not so bad.'
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Come back to bed, God!
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Early on, they were timing my contract with an egg timer.
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Experts say it could take 80 days to drain all of the flood water out of New Orleans. When President Bush heard this he said, '80 days, that's half a vacation.'
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Fish recognize a bad leader.
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Homeland Security Director Tom Ridge has unveiled a new color-coded system to warn the public about different states of danger. Red is the highest state of alert, and it means that Dick Cheney is about to eat a mozzarella stick.
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I still can't really believe that he talked to me, ... If I get hit by a bus tomorrow, they can't take that away from me.
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I think he's the most graceful comedic performer of the century,
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I wanted two solid months of Neil Young, but he told me it was, quote, 'getting creepy,'
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